End of 1st Quarter

Siyempre, it's the end of the first quarter of a tight ballgame.. Unfortunately, the ballgame is about life.. My life. hehe

Well, di ko alam sino kalaban ko sa ballgame na to pero well, marami ata. But great thing is I'm holding on at dikit ang laban. =)

January indeed was a difficult month.. Great at tapos na!!! hehe It was full of difficulties, siyempre ang pressure for both ends of the court, work and shop.. Then yes, the fans, people around me. Pero mabuti at nakaahon naman..

February was a promising month, even di naman na fulfill ang promise pero it was better.. Sa work, kinda survived tapos sa shop, bumaba pero survive pa din lalo na yun mga middle weeks, however ang bad trip lang last month eh ang iksi! hehe Naman..

At siyempre, yun mga plano ko di lahat nagawa kasi of some obstacles saka di na execute.. Well, my fault..

March, up to this day, I can't say it's better or not that worse than January.. Tama lang, pero nahirapan ako ha.. From work, doing the adjustments lalo na sa lipat ng team at sa shop, humina naman this month at aberya pa, pero well, bawi na lang next month!! =)

I also got the time to rest sa March pero kung may extra time and funds, siguro nakapag travel na ko, kaso two of those players medyo mahina pa eh. hehe Pahinga muna sila siguro.

But nevertheless, tapos na ang quarter na yan, lipas na at I'll just make better plays and stronger at the next quarter. Put the right stops and decisions at important masaya pa din.. =)

Ah, loveless pa din. hehe

Damn, I wish I could really play ball, sayang ang height and at least yun like sa basketball, kaso ayun, not fit and worse, my eyesight is not really for basket ball.. I don't want to wear those big googles. hehe

Kahit siguro fit ako, pero yun eyesight ko, poor.. I'll just enjoy watching ball na lang.. =)

I was able to watch the Azkals play today, kahit replay and I can say, may future sila ha.. Kaso mabagal pa sila eh, pero ok yun team, especially the Fil-Spanish dude who looks like Scola.. Sana kung lahat ng Azkals ganun ang build and laro, I can say we can be in the world cup..

Kaso yun team ngayon, malabo pa.. Good luck to them sa qualifiers, with that team, preliminary stages ok, with that defense saka attacking will, kaso ang problem, well, sa final stages.. If we are going against the best in Asia, which has teams like Japan and South Korea.. Like the german coach says, we need a dream team for it.. Kaso, wala pa for now.. =(

However, great thing to them, we pinoys have another sport to enjoy too.. =)

Magstart na ang 2nd quarter, tapos ang time out and let's see how the game is going..

Sana makalamang na after this quarter... hehe

Videodrome

What if television really controls you?

It's hard to answer that question, especially which is in normal sense that if you're addicted of watching TV then yes, you'll rely so much to it..

That's why I don't really watch TV these days, and of course, with crappy programming. hehe

However, this is not the notion at a film I watched, since last year.. A very interesting flick.. It goes beyond addiction.. As it's important premise.

Max Renn is an owner of a cable TV channel which features, obscene or soft porn flicks.. Then as he trying to get some new programming for his channel, something interesting came through his eyes.. A channel that shows extreme violence, hardcore sex and well, torture.. He wants to put these scenes to his channel..

Unfortunately, the signal is not really clear where is coming from.. While searching for that signal, he is dating Nicki Brand, a famous DJ, of course with a lovely voice, a love doctor sort of.. And she has a dark secret as well, she love pain very much. Geez..

Anyhow, they were guest by the way in a show which they met and it's about violence in the media and they dated and at one part, yes, the show asked a question of Videodrome.. The talk show guested one of the makers which is Dr. Oblivion which only shows in a TV set, not in person.

And yes, Max Renn, was getting some weird feeling when he is watching videodrome.. He also got the signal, I mean where is coming from. And it's coming from Pittsburgh.

Max is getting some weird hallucinations and cannot anymore distinguish which is real or not.. At some point, he doesn't know himself. Nicki's case was different, when she saw Videodrome, she wants to participate to it because of the nature and loves it.. Even Max wants to stop it but well, Nicki went through.

Max went to Pittsburgh and found out the place where he is getting the signal. And it's in a optical shop.. He discovered that this is a secret government project to enhance soldier's fighting performance and well, it did not work. He was a subject to it and became more addicted. However, he went to Dr. Oblivion to find some answers, and he did see Dr. Oblivion's only daughter, to find out, Dr. Oblivion is dead and one of the Videodrome makers..

As he was now a subject of Videodrome, he was commanded to kill Oblivion and spread this potent power, which well, he was stopped by the daughter.. By the way, Nicki, was dead and she was indeed a participate in the Videodrome, got tortured to death.

Since the daughter was able to program Max to stop the power and destroy the source, Max because outrageous and killed his programmer, he found out that his programmer was involved and the head of this program, then at the end.. He thought of having this old flesh of videodrome to die and bring out the new flesh from out..

Long live the new flesh!

Max dies.

To tell you honestly, I did not get the plot at first. hehe

I got this film through of course, film blogs and list of controversial films which indeed, controversial..

First of all, the film is directed by one of the best, which David Croenberg, who did Scanners and recently, one of my favorites, History of Violence. Or how about the Fly? hehe

Yes, this was an old film and nice looking trailer as well! hehe It starred James Wood, as Max Renn and yes, I hope she will be casting again, Deborah Harry from Blondie as the hot Nicki Brand!!! Damn!!!

Others, I'm not sure if there are famouse but did a good job of acting. =) Or how about the Canada's former Minister of Ontario provincial government appeared, as well, Japanese Porn Dealer. hehe

Second, this went controversial due to the special effects used which is damn good and grotesque! Mutilations, exploding organs, pure horror and how about the breathing TV? Geez.. Third, yes, the subject itself, I mean at that time, definitely it will be panned because very confusing and cannot determine what the heck is happening!!! hehe Then yeah, for multiple screening, you will understand to it.

I love the scenes as well, especially the transformation sequences, very contemporary and can match these sci fi movies at present.

There are few setbacks, one damn very short. With all happening and thrills at the same time, it's only 93 minutes or 96 tops, but well, I want more! hehe Yes, the plot is confusing and yes, some explicit scenes, just too much.. Hmmm example, the shooting of the boss, that's too much for one bullet in the head! hahaha

But indeed, this film is over the top and I liked the film due to it's message that media or TV really affect our lives especially if it went out of control or used for not really good purposes.. Scary though.. Very symbolistic film.

Simple but indeed possible.. And the effects are great, they don't look cheap and acting is great as well, especially, this is my fave James Woods film! hehe

I know he is a good actor, supporting as well, but when I watched this film, damn, he is cool and simply brought the film in his acting prowess..

The only question is I hope, this film has a sequel, or how about prequel.. Many questions to be answered after I watched it. Like why they make this project, and what really happened behind it? What did happen to Max, which I thought, where is the new flesh or maybe he is still alive..

I heard some news that it will be remake, which I think doesn't need one.. But I just hope, if there is remake or sequel or prequel about this film, it should be under David.. Damn provocative and shocking indeed.. At least after watching it, you can eat lunch or dinner or simple meal. hehe

Long live the new flesh!!!

broken lines (collection 14)

In life you need to....

have money,

have family,

have friends, lot of them,

have enemies, least of them,

have a computer,

have a cellphone,

have an internect connection,

have a car, even I don't drive,

have a house, a simple one,

have a vision,

have a disposition,

have a way,

have a goal,

have a thinking,

have hate,

have anger,

have peace,

have failures,

have pastures,

have happiness,

have despair,

have change,

have the aggressive nature,

have fluency,

have patience and understanding which almost the same,

have pain, lot of it

have rejection upfront,

have hope,

have faith to God,

have faith to others,

have faith to yourself, that you can do it,

have plans,

have other plans,

have a past,

have a future,

have a inbetween,

have sufferring,

have beckoning,

have redemption,

have a success,

have a partner,

have a longtime partner,

have an inseparable partner,

have the love of your life,

have fear,

have to realize you need to face death anytime,

have insurmountable odds to face,

have 80's memories,

have childhood memories,

have school memories,

have your own facebook profile,

have your own identity,

have your own pop culture persona, music, movies,

have your own taste,

have your own estate,

have everything,

have nothing,

have the end of the road,

have sickness,

have decisions will matter,

have some decisions will falter,

have mine,

have you?

have love,

have love for her/him,

have eternal love,

have eternity,

have heaven and hell,

have this driving force,

to enjoy this life and live throughout.. Whatever you have..

have Life.. =)

Kung Ako'y Isang..

(President)

Eh kung PeNoy or P-Noy na tawag sa kin, naisip ko, paano kaya kung presidente ako?

Pero ang sigurado, di mahal ang tuwid na daan ko. hehehe

Nevertheless, it is very hard to have the most stressful job in the land. You need to please not only some people but all the people in this country, not counting of course other pinoys working overseas.. It is hard and to top that, when you have incompetent cohorts, that will be another pressure to yourself.

At siyempre, yun image mo pa, since you need to be transparent, of course lahat ng galaw mo puna, one good example, buying a porsche which well, ayun nasabon. Pero wala siya paki.. Pano kasi, that time, magtataas na lahat ng bilihin.. Wow. hehe

If ako talaga ang CEO of this country, first ang gagawin ko siguro, get the right people in their respective position. One critical branch needs to be really fixed is the cabinet. From the screws, hinges to the doors of it, needs to be changed, at least you get the right fit.

That goes with the people in my cabinet. Walang utang na loob, di ko ilalagay yun mga tumulong sa kin sa election. hehe I know it's impossible kasi siyempre in the election process pa lang, may pangako na halos nasa cabinet pero kung ako President, naku in the campaign, aasa na lang ako sa donations. Well, that another impossible thing, because in this planet alone, a big contribution for campaign means of course some promises, maski head ka lang ng state run paluging company or department, ok na sayo. hehe

Pero yes, I believe the best way to manage the cabinet is to get the right people. For example, DPWH should be run by our brightest or best engineers/architects, kaso hindi eh. One time, it was headed by a retired General or worse, lawyer.. Good lawyer but not engineer.. Then ayun, wala na, no infrastructure projects that will help the people at ayun, may barrios pang parang malayo sa civilization. Geez.

Or how about DBM? Yes, not all of those who handled the position or not even CEO or great finance or accounting greats.. Binibigay sa taong tumulong sa kampanya, the result? Giving targets that are impossible to reach to the collection agencies and yes, taxing the products which are bound to be banned in the future, like Sin Taxes.. Tinataas nila pero di nila alam, like yosi, unti unti na din iban yan.. They don't think the long term perhaps. Marami pwede itax pero well, hindi nila naisip. =(

Of course, di naman mawawala ang corruption in the government, because they are not afraid of the penalty or violations of it, no stiff fines..

Pag ako ang President at may matinding kurakot, edi sibakin agad.. Well, due process? Too late.. Because of our due lawful process, nakaman na ng malaki yun tao, bago sibakin.

For me, well, as long my evidence, resign na dapat. Since transparent naman at walang kaibigan eh sibak na dapat, I want that head!!! hehe

Transparency, of course, since if you want to be transparent and lead by example, iwas siyempre sa alam mong mas maraming batikos kaysa sa papuri. For example, siyempre di ako bibili ng porsche, in these desperate time at inflation is unstoppable.. Kung luho pa man din, it's either saka ka na bumili or ipunan mo or kung talagang mayaman ka, eh wag mo na lang ipaalam sa tao, sa PSALM na lang. hehe

Kung di mo papaalam, edi wag naman lagi di ba. Napakahirap kasi yun bili ka ng bili tapos lahat ng tao hirap na hirap, parang di naman tama..

Of course, kung transparent, eh kung ako naman, dapat paalam mo muna or consult the public before making a move, di naman ata tama na sige ok lang taas dito taas doon tapos sige let private corporations assist our infrastructure and so on, which is dapat may consultation not only sa experts but also the public..

I mean, pagdebate na lang natin sa congress or cabinet, di yun biglang sige ok na yun because you think it's right.. You think.. Remember, you own decision.. Ok lang kung it's a simple decision but it involves a lot of right decision, or risk, long term and short term.. Capital, everything! And of course, your people..

Kaya, di pwede yun sige lang ng sige..

Then, yes, to lead by example, I mean, not late on meetings, has good agenda that will make people follow.. Hmmmmm Discipline and execution of the laws of the land..

About the enemies of the state, sige peace process, pero pagayaw, wound them.. Pag ayaw pa din, terminate them. hehe

Justice system? Hmmmm well, that handled by different branch but if I can beg to speed up all the cases and make the right moves to uphold the law, sige gagawin ko kahit kulitin ko pa ang SC to really deliver the law for all the people. At least, balance the scale of all the people..

Fiscally sound judgements.. Di utang ng utang like me.. hehe Pero tama na, just rely on what we have and yes, make the right infrastractures physically and financially.. Ok naman yun private and public partnership kaso siyempre di naman madali yun, kasi we should be not relying to private corpo but due to our poor funding, well, we have no choice.. =(

Yes, no more pinoys leaving our country to seek better pastures. If we have all the foreign investments and we treat them as par with other countries or better than them just to generate income and employement here, why not di ba.. Kaso we need to change our constitution to do that..

Which of course, I won't let happen... The constitution is not in full execution yet.. Even others gusto na palitan kasi di daw nagwork, eh pano di nagwork eh di naman natin ginagamit.. From justice to the amedments and other laws na pinasa, parang wala pa eh.. Mahirap..

Kaya maganda, let's make it work first fully then pag panget talaga, palitan na.

International relations are important pero di pwede sa kin yun military excercise o pasuyo naman na palayain yun mga bilanggo dito or dalin mo sila dito, we will take care of it.. No! Pag bitay dito, edi sorry. No excuses.. Even US or China.. We will follow treaties, nandiyan na eh pero pag may extra pa which is beyond the treaty, well, sorry.. We have our rules here and this is our house! =)

Death penalty? Should be back, gusto ko nga yun style ni Macoy, Firing squad sa luneta, basta tama yun papaexecute even plunder offenders, with matching Spanish scenary, sige.. Firing squad.. Or by request injection siguro. hehe

Hmmmm Yes, the state and church should be separate as long of course some laws needed to consult with the church.. RH bill perhaps, ako ok ako dun.. I know yes, medyo tatamaan yun law ni God na magparami pero the people should have access to family planning in full scale.. Mahirap ngayon ha lalo na, naman mahal ang bilihin.. And ok lang if state has centrelink benefits, kaso wala eh. hehe Kailangan magtipid..

Of course, since magtipid, ganun din gagawin ko sa expenses ng goverment.. Close the agencies which doesn't work or useful and of course, non performing except for the generating agencies.

Then, for the arts, culture, sports, and our natural resources, should be protected.. Sports, help our athletes, kasi maglimos na ko sa private sector. hehe Arts, such us film and music, no more tax sa local artist, more tax for foreign artist! And films, no more censorship, we should have parang phil film council like the defunct UK film council, more funding to the pinoy films, or arts.. And even support international filmfest.. Meron lang siguro film board just to see kung kikita ang film mo sa madla, like rating pero no cuts of course.. =)

Then, yes, to make the philippines proud by almost doing not only for the money or generate funds for our people, pero to showcase our nation as a strong nation.. That we are proud to be Pinoy.

I felt naman, if we have just the right government and management, mas magaling pa tayo sa ibang bansa.. We can be a threat to G-8 or 7 countries, basta we have the right decisions and handle our colorful culture well and make the people work hard, malayo mararating natin!

We are indeed a strong republic.. I love this country.. Maybe that's the reason why I can't leave this place.. The people, the tropical scenary, the food, friends, and even our lupang hinirang, I'm proud.. Even kung aalis ko whatever, I am Filipino. =)

Tama na muna to, yun lang naisip ko kung ako eh si P-noy, kaya di ko siya binoto. hehe Malamang di lahat o kahit isa sa mga sinabi ko, gagawin niya. hehe

I'm just looking forward sa 2016..

And if I will be given this job today, sige! Pero alis lahat ng cabinet, saka head ng agencies or GOC's...

Kasi I want total reset.. =)

F.A.S

"Ha? 5am na!!!, naku bihis na ko"

"Anong nangyari? Bakit 12am na?"

"Sige mamaya na yan, pagod na ko, I'll sleep muna.. (Pag gising, 3am na!)"

(Kung anong suot paguwi, yun pa din ang suot pag gising..)

Those were the results na pag naiidlip or sige pahinga muna ko moment or tulog muna ako.. hehe

Yes, that's how important yun bed sa kin, kahit sobrang tempting, na kahit gusto ko muna gawin ang isang bagay kaso di eh.. Ayun, tulog..

Yes, that's how tiring everyday is.. Kahit wala masyado clerical, except for my job pero yun mind bending decisions everyday, ayun, the only good rest I have is sleep.. Not even blogging or surfing.. Geez.. How about sa sounds, minsan nakakatulugan ko din yun sounds ko. hehe Kaya pag gising, low batt!

It has some upsides, of course, first I get to really rest.. Saka I can reflect naman at that silence, reflect spiritually and at the same time, looking back what happened today and plans for bukas..

Or it also serves as an escape especially when you had, a very bad day.. Even na gusto ko magwala o magalit, natutulog ko na lang.. =)

Then of course, may bad effects, numero uno! Siyempre since may mga schedule na gagawin, ayun namiss ko, bad trip, kaya nadadala next day, or worse, within the week. hehe Siyempre, not all the sleep I had was long, siyempre gising tapos tulog ulit kasi nagugulat na lang ako eh. hehe

Saka ayun, yun mga customer ko sa load, nagtext na na di ko naman nakausap or reply, pagdating sa office, medyo irate. hehe Sorry naman..

Actually, parang nagstart siya nun college pero not that often like now.. Geez.. Kaya mahirap ang sked ko kasi yun tulog, less predictable around 9pm onwards.. Even I want to finish everything, or the task at hand within the day, ayun. Minsan I really missed it..

I don't know how I'm gonna solve this syndrome, for now siguro, less tasks for the day pero I hope I could solve it para some days, deretcho na ko at walang left undone.

Let's see on that pag start na end of DST. =)

Di pa ko inaantok...

realizations (part 20)

317. Love? I really missing it.. When in Love really makes you do different things, just for that person. =)

318. I call her in a different name. Especially if that name makes her simply smile.

319. I do other things just to make her feel special, for example, I forgot.. =)

320. I don't care anymore what I have, or what I am doing, I am willing to sacrifice that and even time to spend with her..

321. I just melt for her.. hehe Especially when she talks or were in a conversation, it's blinding me..

322. that when we were in the getting to know stage, I do some sacrifices or giving always what she wants but when in a relationship, I did more, more than I thought I can't give..

323. I get a good sleep, always..

324. Motivated to go to work even I have a bad work day..

325. Even I'm so very tired, I still do things that she wants me to do.. =)

326. It is, I have a smile in my face even in pressure, or anxiety, brave enough to face anything. Naks! Parang nga..

327. I wake up in the morning relieved because after some rituals, the first person I'm going to talk, is her which makes my day right..

328. I gave more freedom, when we were together than before we went into a relationship..

329. I put a lot of trust, hope and faith.. to her.. =)

330. I was motivate to make changes just to impress her.. Trying. hehe

331. Even we have fights or quarrel, I tend to give way first.. Even well, it hurts me but you really need to let go..

332. I did miss these things.. For a long time.. =(

unplanned 22

Whew, ang haba naman nun mga past posts ko. =)

Yes, nagiisip na lang ako kung ano pa masusulat ko for the remaining days in March.

Anyway, it was difficult this month, all around me, was well, not going as I planned. Pero yun pahinga ko for 3 days, I can say ok naman, more on intellectual and yes, need a break. Kahit kulang sa tulog pero di naman pagod.. May isang VL pa ko this March. hehe

Of course, it's almost the second quarter so I need to be prepared.

I was unprepared for Sucker punch and better yet, not that happy. hehe

Wala na ko masabi for now, kasi sa sobrang dami ko iniisip o dapat gawin, gusto ko sana ng mahaba ang pahinga but oh well, di ko pwede gawin yun especially this year.. The only rest I can get I guess is this, surfing the net or even well, watch TV.. To ease the pressure and think, and I hope do right.. =)

As I surf the net, minsan nakakalimutan ko yun mga dapat ko gawin, pero for now, mukhang matatapos na like check some reports and plans to really solve problems, money perhaps. I missed surfing kasi for the longest time, to check info and blogs na din..

Pero ang di ko pa talaga magawa eh yun watching my movies with my dependable dvd player. hehe I tested na at 80% of the movies I got, can be played.. Great. =)

I hope na this following quarters will be productive, from work, to shop and in my life, sana may marating naman di ba.. It's nice to finish what you started.. It will be a long and hard work, pero as long I followed and stick to it, believe some luck and prayers, it will end in a nice way.

Summer? Ah, I saw her.. Este, summer pala, wala naman plans eh. Eh is Sir Rheg, mukhang di na tuloy ang summer trips so malamang ako, spend time with work and shop.. Preparing for more challenges.. =)

At yes, kailangan mabalik na ang broken lines.. Grabe ang huli eh nun October pa! Malas ata yun 13 talaga. hehe

Ano pa, dami ko pa aayusin pero di naman tedious unlike before, pero siyempre I know, it won't end..

March was fulfilling, full of hope, but less happiness but it was better.. Better than January but better pa din yun Feb. hehe

As I reach of getting old, yes even it will happen pa next 3 months, I want to be mature in facing these challenges. Maybe I'm selfish to face it all by myself but let's face it, in times of these adversities.. The only one who can really help is indeed.. You.. With the help of course from Him, up there..

For sure, I feel it won't be easy sa mga susunod na panahon pero siyempre, kailangan matatag sa mga ganito..

Nakalimutan ko pala, naku di ko pa nababasa yun mga books na binigay sa kin or even yun mga binili ko. Grabe eh..

Saka ang init, summer na nga.. Pero tamang init, meaning can handle it unlike past years na parang nasa desert ka at parang di na matatapos yun init.. At least ngayon, masarap pa din sa gabi. =)

Yes, start na ng bagong team, Monday at sana kahit di kasing saya nun last time, basta magaling ok lang sa kin yun.. Same great TL pa din ako eh. hehe Sige, aaminin ko, ok lang matalo na kami sa extra curricular sa team eh kinalat na kami eh.. Hahaha

What I did 12 days ago? Hmmmm wala, I just remembered.

Remember that person.